January 28, 2007

Raider Ramblings

Comedian Ron White does a bit about being on a plane bound for Phoenix that develops engine trouble and needs to return to the airport. A nervous passenger asks if they’ll make it and Ron responds "you bet, he says, all the way to the crash site".
If you are an Oakland Raiders fan you are asking yourself the same question. Ever since Jon Gruden bailed out then proceeded to beat Bill Calahan senseless with his own play book in Super Bowl XXXVII, the Raiders have been in a death spiral. First with Calahan, followed briefly by Norv Turner. Even in the down years of the late eighties and early nineties the team has never performed this badly, nor given absolutly no glimmer of hope to a hungry Raider Nation.
I held my breath that Art Shell II would turn things around until he stated after week three, that when the team returned after the bye week they had a "few things" to work out.
When they get back? You loose the first three games of the regular season and you get a week off? You don't get a week off ya bunch of yahoos. You get to bust ass in two a days till you got those "things" worked out.
"In the unlikely loss of cabin pressure the oxygen masks will automatically drop down in front of you. Quit screaming like a little girl and put it on!"
Thanks Art, Don't let the door hit you on the backside.
Al Davis had to realize by the number of applicants that beat a path to his Coliseum door that the wings have completely fallen off the machine. Even though the Raiders have become the Lions, Davis was eventually was able to persuade 30 year old Lane Kiffin to be the fresh meat thrown into the new Black Hole of coaching.
Kiffin will need to find a quarterback and build some kind of an offense in the off season, a tough job even without Al Davis being at the controls. He also will also inherit a disgruntled defense whose loyalties lie with D-coordinator Rob Ryan (who was passed over for the top job) , and when he gets that squared away he gets a chance to deal with the likes of Randy Moss, the most over-hyped player to have never played the game.
For Kiffin, Head Coach may look good on the resume but only if he is able to walk away from the crash.
Good Luck Kid. Hope you brought your chute.

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